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Men have their own dance too, but I think we run into trouble when we expect men to read our minds," Barth says.Couples need to actively engage with each other and alert their partner to what it is they need or want. Sometimes they don't get it right; it's not about getting it verbatim, it's about getting the gist of it," Barth says.Committing to discussing issues, respecting each other's opinions, and focusing on answers over being right is a change the individual must make and can't be forced by one partner on the other.For couples to put money in their relationship bank, appreciation exercises can help each of you feel better about the other.These are important because, if a "couple gets into a fight, and one throws out an olive branch, and the other tosses it aside, it prolongs the argument and again needing to be right." It's important to accept the olive branch or at least recognize that it has been offered.
A repair attempt is when one partner or another tries to make peace or attempt a resolution over their differences.
"The best time to do the work is when you're on neutral territory.
Just like you eat a meal before you go shopping, so you can get what you need rather than trying to just quell your hunger.
Relationships need to empower the couple and they need to commit to resolving their issues, because trying to win the argument costs the relationship.
Establish rules for discussing the problems as they arise.